Thursday, October 11, 2007

Munnabhai Jokes!



MUNNA BHAI: Mamu, tu kitna pada hai?


MAMU: B.A.


MUNNA BHAI: Sala, two akshar pada aur woh bhi ulta?



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MUNNA BHAI: Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?





GIRL: Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol pada?



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MAMU: Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Tamil sikhna padega. Kuch upay batao.



MUNNA BHAI: Tamil kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?


MAMU: Meinay ek Tamil baccha adopt kiya hai, aur woh char mahinay mein bolne lagay ga.



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PROFESSOR: Akal badi ki bhais?





MUNNA BHAI: Bole toh pehlay date of birth bata mamu.



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CIRCUIT: Aye Mamu, tereko papad aur jhapad mein pharak pata hai kya?



MAMU: Nahin.


CIRCUIT: Thu kha ke dekh le, pata chal jayega.



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MUNNA BHAI: Mamu, apun bachpan mein dus maley ke building se gir gaya tha.





MAMU: Aarey, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?





MUNNA BHAI: Yaad nehin hai yaar. Bahut purane baat hai.





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MAMU: Oye, maar gayay yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath aa rehla hai.





MAMU KA DOST: Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha.



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Munna: Abay Circuit! Jaa baajo walay ghar say Doctor ko bula k laa, meri tabiat kharab ho reli hai.





Circuit: Aey Bhai ! aap to khud doctor ho.





Munna: Bolay to meri fees buhat zyada hai.



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Munna: Bolay to Apun ko tera operation dobara karna paray ga. Kyun k apun kay rubber k gloves teray andar hi reh gaye hain.





Patient: Agar yeh baat hai to mujhay jaanay do. Mien tumharay gloves ki payment kar doon ga.





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Thursday, October 4, 2007

Mind Boggling Maths!

Only Mathematic wizards dare to see this one..... lol

Italian Girl....


A woman goes to Italy to attend a two week, company training session.Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.The wife answers, "Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?"The husband laughs and says, "An Italian girl!!!"The woman kept quiet and left.Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks, "So, honey, how the trip was?""Very good, thank you.""And, what happened to my present?""Which present?" She asked."The one I asked for - an Italian girl!!" "Oh, that" she said "Well, I did what I could; now we have to wait for few months to see if it is a girl!!!"

Monday, October 1, 2007

Boring day!

Yo ppl, sup? Hope you guys had a nice weekend. Well, I had a fantastic weekend... but having a great boring day today :( Don't feel like doing anything, thanks to monday blues. Man, I don't know why the hell these mondays come, heah... sucks!

I thought, let me write something... atleast this brings me out of boredom. I hope it will :)

Went to Richmond on Saturday to meet couple of friends. Drive was awesome, luckily there was not much traffic this time and drove both ways smoothly. It had been a while I haven't updated my ipod, so I had downloaded new albums. Those downloads made my drive rock, I shud say. I played Saawariya, Jab We Met, Partner, Bhool Bhulaiya, Om Shanti Om, Heyy Babyy.... Partner tops my chart list, I liked title songs from Saawariya, Bhool Bhulaiya and few from the rest.

Drove straight down to meet a friend who flew from Atlanta, spent sometime there before I left to meet another. That place was somewhere in downtown. And had to drive around 15 miles to meet the other friend. It was around 1:30 by the time I reached. I picked him up and reached a nearby mall in search of nice restaurant to have our lunch. There were Maggiano's, Tara Thai, California Pizza Kitchen, and few other. Finally, we decided to go to California Pizza Kitchen and it was a wise decision thou. We had Lettuce Wraps with chicken, Tuscan Hummus, and Thai Crunch Salad. Food was awesome as always. Went around in the mall for a while and found nothing exciting to kill our time. Then we decided to go watch a movie. There were few new movies, The Kingdom, The Game Plan, Good Luck Chuck etc., and I had no idea how their reviews were, there was also a showing of 'Bourne Ultimatum' in 10 minutes, I knew that movie was great and I instantly said let's go (I finally happened to watch this movie after a long wait :)). Movie was terrific, Matt again showed his magic on screen.

ughh... it was 6:30 in the evening... dropped off my friend... and time to go home. I set my GPS, it showed 108 miles to reach my home and reached much early than I expected as there was minimal traffic. Came home, had dinner and watched movie 'Chalti Ka Naam Gaadi', an old hindi classic which was made in 1958 with fantastic music and out-and-out comedy. Movie was good and the day was good too....

I was feeling too lazy on sunday... all I did was lying on bed to surf internet and watch TV and '10 Commandments', a 1956 classic. I even procrastinated my laundry.... hehe...

Alri fellas... have a nice week... and of course, I already started waiting for the next weekend;)

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Is India Really A Super Power???


This was the question I always had in my mind, is India really a super power?



At 60 years of Independence, India is going very strong economically and creating new ripples to show its strength and global face. Real estate is booming, multiplexes, BPO's, IT parks are mushrooming everywhere. Re is 9 1/2 year high versus $. Sensex touched 17,000 mark which is all time high, thanks to unbelievable performance of the stock market. New trend of Indian companies acquiring foreign companies has started. No need to mention, Indians spreaded across the globe working for billion dollar companies with high profile jobs and awarded as the best brains in the world. Because of the booming economy, Reverse Brain Drain has started.




As a coin has two sides, above said is one side and let's see the other side too....




At the same 60 years of Independence, India has 2nd highest population in the world (1.136bn currently) and is estimated to have 1.63bn by 2050 to overtake China. Literacy of current total population is 61% whereas our neighbor and competitor China is at 90.9%. India is estimated to have 5.5mn AIDS patients, 2nd highest in the world. According to 2001 census data, 40mn of Indian population lives in slums and sadly 5mn of this population are young children (0-6 age group) and 5mn live in Mumbai alone, I also read somewhere that Mumbai slums are the biggest in the world. According to 2004-2005 stats, inspite of the booming economy, India's poverty rate is still at 27.5%. Apart from these, there are many other issues like corruption, dirty politics, underworld, inefficient police etc.,


There is a political party called 'LokParitran' started few years ago by few IITians, but I hardly see them in the news. I am not even sure if they are still active and preparing for coming elections. I really wonder why people in India won't encourage young, educated, and dynamic politicians. How many more decades we should bare these stupid uneducated politicians who just keep winning with the power of money and rigging and whose aim is to make more money than they spent for the elections? Ridiculous!!

Last week I was watching 'Salaam, Bombay!' and then I was like totally in a new world watching those street children who lives in slums and grow up with no education and no money to spoil all their lives with so many bad habits in a very bad companionship. I felt for a second, 'How many great brains India might be missing?'. I felt the same even when I was watching 'Traffic Signal'. Having so many problems like poverty, illiteracy in a country like India is not a wonder, but continuing the same even after six decades of independence is a wonder. Isn't it the time to think and act??


I am sure, India is transforming slowly to globalize and coming out of poverty, illiteracy, but I think this pace is not enough. There is cut throat competetion among the countries. Our country should improve in many things even to match with our neighboring countries like Singapore, Malaysia, China, HongKong etc. If we want to beat them, oh yeah, we really need to work hard and show them what real India is....


From my point of view, as an Indian, India is a super power in many things and will reach the top soon. All we need to do is, change the system in the best possible way, unleash the best talent (which is never touched), let's fight for corruption free government and clean politics, eradicate the poverty and illiteracy. If the above things are covered, then other small issues will be taken care.




So, what do you think? 'Is India really a super power?'

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Blonde Passenger

A blonde is on a four-engine plane crossing the Atlantic. All of a sudden there's a loud bang. The pilot announces over the intercom “I'm sorry, one of our engines has just shut off. We'll be delayed 45 minutes.” Suddenly there's another bang. Once again, the intercom clicks on and the pilot expresses his regret that they'll be delayed two hours. Shortly thereafter, there is another bang and the pilot announces that they'll be delayed 3 hours. The blonde turns to the guy sitting beside her and says, “Man, if the fourth engine shuts off we'll be up here all day.”

Monday, September 24, 2007

Take a bow, Team India!


First things first, My hearty congratulations to men in blue and every single Indian out there! First it was South Africa, then Australia, and now Pakistan.... marvelous job guys! You are the best!!

What a fantastic day it is. This is the day which every Indian must celebrate. Finally, Dhoni's Dragons, with impeccable performance, have proved critics and odds wrong. Yes, you guys made it! I was eagerly waiting for today's match since 48 hours. It was the first time in my life I waited for a match so eagerly and I knew, it was worth waiting.

I am sure, today must be the happiest day for all cricket lovers which includes me:) Dhoni and guys simply did a superb job and were at their best. Today is the most remarkable and memorable day in the Indian Cricket History. India is the Inagural Twenty20 World Champion! Sounds so sweet.....

And yes, the jinx still continues, India beat Pakistan in all World Cups and World Championships... Shah Rukh's presense in the final added more spice to it... Chak De! India

To conclude, Team India needs loads of wishes for the India vs Australia 2007 Cricket Series and they deserve the best wishes from us!

All the best Dhoni's Dragons!
Deepak